Write Where You Are is a blog written by Kathryn Gustafson about books, life, food, and a little bit of everything
by Kathryn Gustafson
There were two voices:
One falling down
Into a long, dark
Hole.
The other echoing back
To white, empty
Air.
Then I realized: it was not two voices after all.
Just one. Just mine,
With nowhere to go,
But up and down
the deep well
inside of me.
by Kathryn Gustafson
There are things that might seem plain
About the box you think I’m in
Because of how I speak quietly
With a softness that could sound like timidity
And the way my questions form, sometimes,
Falling childlike at
the end of lines.
I don’t weigh the measure of my time
Against the world’s rigidities,
But it’s not because I have no fire.
In fact, I have my mother’s complicated ire,
Balanced by
My father’s chess games, admonitions,
And the words of a thousand books
That make a world within my head.
I’ve lived through my childhood horrors,
Met death inside the eyes of others’,
Held hands of people that I love, as they left this life forever.
I fight each day against a mind
That’s knotted as a tangled line
With a heart which has been shattered,
A resilience that is tested, battered.
It’s exhausting to admit:
How much loving people hurts.
(How many times do I remind myself what love is worth?)
So I watch and weigh the fire and the words.
To find the phrases that would win
the wars,
And lose the love.
Power to win.
Or chance to bloom?
A choice that no one would assume,
Is difficult.
But the gentle rebel in me knows.
That where things are burning,
Nothing can grow.
…(An Alliterative Appellation)
…(Sorry. I couldn’t help myself.)
Hello fellow readers, and happy October! Something about Autumn, I think, is especially appealing to literary folk. C’mon: some adventurous novels, blue skies, chilly air?
OR
Dark, rainy nights, pumpkin spice candles, and a glass of Merlot served alongside mysterious and chilling tales?
You guys know what I’m talking about.
‘Tis the reading season.
Awhile back, I comprised a list of autumn reads for kids/ teens for Hip Homeschool moms. (You can read that one on their Website, here.)
When I shared the list with a friend, she asked me what my autumn book list would be for adults. Not like “for adults,” but more like the, “unedited version.”
While all of the classics from my teen list would remain (because let’s be honest, most of us can still enjoy kid and YA fiction), there are also some fall-ish novels that I love but wouldn’t feel comfortable openly recommending for YA (and under) readers. Below, you’ll find a mix of all of the above making up my top 20 autumnal reads.
Autumn Classics (These are for Pretty Much Everyone.)
1.Jane Eyre by Charlotte Bronte- a unique heroine, a mansion with a dark secret, the test of love between two passionate souls, and a touch of magical realism that seems unique to the setting of North England. Jane Eyre is of my favorites anytime, but especially in fall and winter.
2. Wuthering Heights by Emily Bronte– Those Bronte sisters really knew how to weave together the feelings of a conflicted heart alongside the mystery of the English moors. Oh, Heathcliff—in high school I loved you, and as an adult I love to hate you. I still read about you and Cathy every year, though; your tortured and unhealthy relationship is undeniably haunting.
3. Rebecca by Daphne Du Maurier– Again with that Cornish setting. But can anyone argue that the misty moors and the roar of the cold English ocean is just plain exciting and mysterious and lends itself so completely to thrilling and slightly spooky stories like Du Maurier’s Rebecca? Okay, no arguments? Good. (Sidenote: I can’t wait for the Netflix film version coming out later this month…just another reason you need to read this book this October!)
4. I Capture the Castle by Dodie Smith- An uber cozy 1930s account of an English girl who aspires to be a writer and chronicles the eccentric characters and happenings around her. Yes, I know–another British one. *Anglophile alert*
5. The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald- Hey, it’s an actual American novel (Arguably one of THE American novels.) Gatsby is another favorite novel of mine anytime of the year, and it’s arguably a perfect summer OR autumn read. The thrilling roar of summertime and its dreams takes up most of the book’s premise, but the momentum leads to the fateful first fall of the leaves…the end of summer and its illusions (and delusions).
Autumn YA Novels that Adults Will Enjoy Too
(Because Adults Actually Read Just as Many YA Novels As Teens Do)
6. Shiver (and Wolves of Mercy Falls Series) by Maggie Stiefvater –Not just another paranormal werewolf romance story. This New York Times Bestselling Author totally gets the raw emotions of first love. It’s a sweet and beautifully melancholy tale.
7. The Mortal Instruments Series by Cassandra Clare- You know that metallic, green book you’ve seen at Target with the washboard bare torso of a young guy on the cover? Yes, I’m actually putting that book (and the rest of the series) on my list as guilty pleasure-reads for autumn (but hey, I’m listing them all as “one” book. ) I’m not sure who was in charge of marketing/cover layouts, but The Mortal Instruments is only slightly about dudes with abs. It’s a fun supernatural series with lots of action and witty banter: a fun series for some bathtub reading on a chilly day.
8. Wintersong by S. Jae. Jones- Labyrinth meets Phantom of the Opera! I actually reviewed this one here. It’s a dark fairy-tale that fantasy lovers will gobble up.
9. The Diviners by Libba Bray- I’m actually reading this one right now: 1920s Manhattan, mysterious murders, a plucky flapper heroine, supernatural bumps in the night. Libba Bray is a great writer, and this book is actually pretty darn creepy for a YA novel. The characters are very teenager-ly…but the story is pretty adult (kind of like her Gemma Doyle series).
10. Warm Bodies by Issac Marion- Just your typical little post-apocalyptic love story/comedy/commentary on human nature (narrated by a Zombie.) Whatever.
11. The Beekeeper’s Apprentice by Laurie R King – While not technically written for a Young Adult audience, this story is definitely appealing/appropriate for teens or adults. It’s a super cozy and engaging introduction to King’s Beekeeper series, which follows a retired Sherlock Holmes and the bright, young woman who becomes his assistant.
12. THE HARRY POTTER SERIES by J. K. Rowling- If you haven’t read Harry Potter then you should. It’s okay to re-read it whenever you want, especially in fall. That’s all I have to say about that.
Not Your Kiddo’s Halloween Booklist (I think the category speaks for itself)
13. Outlander by Diana Gabaldon- Sweeping and kind of steamy historical/romance/adventure/quasi-fantasy that you’ve all probably heard of (because, you know, Starz). Because there’s some rough stuff in it, I don’t recommend Outlander to everyone, even though I personally have enjoyed what I’ve read of the series. The first books starts out with Clare stepping through standing stones in the Highlands during the feast of Samhain (Gaelic Halloween), which is one of the things that makes the first novel of this series a great October read.
14. Smoke and Mirrors by Neil Gaiman– A profound, weird, creepy, adult collection of fantastical short stories. A dash of spooky and a dollop of thoughtfulness.
15. Dead Before Dawn (A Sookie Stackhouse novel) Charlaine Harris- A Cajun-infused chick-lit romance/ blood-and-gore/ mystery/ vampire novel. A little bit of a guilty pleasure but super fun (and amazingly successful given the amount of genre crossover).
16. Interview with the Vampire by Anne Rice- Arguably the most iconic vampire novel since Dracula. It’s fascinating and dark and compelling.
17. Dracula by Bram Stoker- This year was actually my first year reading Dracula (with my bookclub!) It was a slow-starter, but once I was hooked I was surprised by how much I enjoyed it. It felt much more “mystery” to me than horror. Teen kids would be okay reading this one, actually.
18.- 19. Rules of Magic/ Practical Magic by Alice Hoffman! I wrote a whole post about this series already! Read it here.
20. Magic Lessons by Alice Hoffman-the prequel to the last two books I mentioned! It’s currently next up on my nightstand, and I can’t wait.
There are so many books springing to mind now that I’m calling this list “done.” However, 20 seems like a good place for me to stop…for now. How about you? What are some books that scream autumnal, Halloweenish mystery to you?
I look forward to hearing about them!
-Katie
We put out fires
And forge the unexpected paths
Through the oldest mountains.
Do you ever stop to think about
How we overcome changes of space and time
Like a magic trick
That no one sees,
Or that everyone expects?
We take on new forms constantly,
And make it look like serenity itself
Like the most natural thing in the world.
Thank you to all the women who carry the health of an entire family on your back, sometimes with no acknowledgment for the way you have sacrificed your status, your body, the dreams of a younger self. Thank you, also, to those women who flaunt their intelligence and expertise in the workplace, who are not afraid to be called “bossy,” because they know they are simply leaders. These paths are seen as oppositions to one another, but they are not. They are both brave. Neither is understood fully by society. We choose one, the other, or some combination of both. There is rarely a situation wherein everyone understands our choices. We make them anyway.
Thank you for those who do things differently, to the warriors who never felt supported. Thank you to those who appear so very delicate on the outside, but who love more strongly than anyone else in the world.
Thank you to the mothers and the daughters and the friends who know exactly what words are needed to heal a broken heart. Thank you, friends, for the way you have taught and inspired all of us.
It drifted in twirling pathways
Of deep grey rain and golden sunbursts
On the mountains
–Your last autumn.
Anxious finches, the rustling light on leaves.
The world in memory. The world in preparation.
Only in Fall
Can the world be angled so differently.
Your eyes were a cerulean blue,
Like the sky,
Your last autumn.
I wonder what moments were focused in those lenses.
Crinkly-smile lines and warm sweater hugs?
The final leaf falls, in a sigh.
But now it is some other Fall,
And I see grays and golds
And blues
And you.
-Kathryn Gustafson, 2016
In case you didn’t know, Groundhog’s Day was this week.
And Puck-satanu…PUSUTO (Googling this)… Punxsutawney Phil has declared an early spring. Does anyone else ever feel like this happens very rarely? For years and years and years, it was just those extra weeks of cold. There’s probably a scientific reason for this that I learned once-upon-a-time, but while I can make myself Google the correct spelling of a groundhog’s proper name, I don’t really feel like mustering up the energy to remember how the seasons work right now. Deal with it.
I’m happy about an early spring, even though it’s not my very favorite season (autumn is, on strict principal)…. Growing up in the North Georgia mountains, surrounded by trees and a big, beautiful lake, autumn was a signal of adventure. It wasn’t just the crisp chill in the air, the smell of campfire smoke or the fiery leaves, either. Autumn was the time we went camping, autumn was when we could take a break to go meet my grandparents in a cabin in the mountains for our annual, special get-together. I miss autumn in the mountains.
Right now, however, I live in Mississippi. And Mississippi’s Queen of the Seasons is undoubtedly Spring.
The light here changes, illuminating the numerous old gray barns and buildings. In winter they are old and worn-out, in summer they are white-washed harshly, seeming unfriendly. In the spring, the gold touches them, hinting at their history, their magic. In spring all old things are brought to life again; they have transcended through time, and been born anew.
Mornings of a hundred years ago are freshly evoked: the smell of warm, damp grass and hay, the sunshine on dew-drops in the green fields, and the soothing saltiness of the air that only comes with being not far from the coast.
There is a lush, floral scent, too, hanging on every bush and tree. Gardenias and azaleas mostly, I think, but dozens of other flowers chime in with their own accent fragrances.
For me, there are also the memories of Mississippi springs from my growing up years. The trips we took to visit family for so many years on warm, balmy vacations, the Easters with cousins, running around in gardens, the family meals and something special in the true closeness with these people we only saw a few times a year.
Now I live here, as a grown-up in a whole different place of life. I have that closeness, but it is different now. So many things have changed since then, and the memories I share with my family is mingled with loss and newness and love and freshly found relationships.
Spring, I think, will embrace these changes, because it is, itself, always reminiscent, and always new.
So I’m waiting on the flowers to bloom in the front yard, for the day I can pull my shorts and flip-flops out of storage, for sitting on the porch and inhaling that sweet, country breeze that carries with it the love of a hundred Mississippi springs before this one.
We go to bed early, the windows thrust open to let in the night music: cicadas, frogs, the distant war-call of coyotes and foxes. Because we live at the end of the road, at the end of the world, we hear it all. Our bed is pushed up to the large window, so we balance on our knees (like children) and crane our necks, heads tilted upward at the stars. No other lights for miles around.
A howl bursts through the edge of the woods and we jump. Then giggle. Then sit back and just look. Continue reading “Big and Small”
The shoes were off: flip-flops, neon sneakers and pink Toms scattered all over the room.
The desks are pushed aside.
“Grab your pillows,” I command. They flutter to the reading nook under the window and select their fluffy aid. Continue reading “Meditation Pose”
Write Where You Are | Books, Life, Food, a Little Bit of Everything 